...Mitts tax bracket

Whats the big deal with Mitt Romney paying 15% in taxes? He didn't write the tax code. After all he's not the President... yet. Romney had nothing to do with the Bush tax cuts that kept the capital gains rate so low. He also had nothing to do with President Obama extending the Bush tax cuts in 2010.

If I were Romney I would say thank you very much President Obama for keeping my taxes so low and allowing me to remain in the 1% even though your election year populist message acknowledges the growing disparity between rich and poor. I'm glad the middle class is carrying the burden for the country as our deficit grows due to an unfair tax code that allows millionaires like me to get away with not paying his fair share. If I (Mitt Romney) were President I would have a flatter tax code and get rid of the loopholes but thats just me (Mitt Romney.)

Was Mitt supposed to offer to overpay this past year because the 99% occupiers on the left FEELS his taxes are too low and he might be accused of greed in a general election? Neither you nor I would pay any more in taxes than we had to. We would put the profits from our investments in a Super PAC and run for President too.

...The New Hampshire primary

Mitt Romney fired his way to the top of the NH primary receiving 37% of the vote with Ron Paul a surprising second with 24%. Pauls newsletter at press time says he is just pleased as punch there are no blacks or homos in NH. The other candidates ended in the low teens and single digits. Santorum, Huntsman, and Gingrich have just concluded their concession speeches. They all agree the primary was still a great success and vow to continue their campaign. At least thats what I think Huntsman said since he was speaking Mandarin. For all I know he may have been ordering some moo goo gai pan for his supporters. Santorum wondered how come Herman Cains momentum lasted for months while his only lasted the duration of a nonstop flight from Des Moines to Manchester He swore he'd come up with a flat tax proposal, revolutionize deep dish pizza, or at least sexually harass a woman or two before South Carolina. Gingrich just scowled and gnarled for twenty minutes at the thought of Romney as the nominee. Even Rick Perry, who received one percent of the vote which is only one more percent of the vote than I received, has sworn to continue the campaign in South Carolina. I suspect more to play a few rounds of golf, have some good barbecue, and to see his pain management connection in Greenville more so than actually believing he can still be competitive in this race. Mitt Romney moves on to South Carolina where he seeks a third decisive victory and the opportunity to give the rest of the candidates their pink-slips.

The BCS championship

Even though Tim Tebow and the NFL playoffs stole most of Monday nights game thunder Im still so into the game between Bama and LSU. College football peaked last week. The game should have been played last week before the NFL playoffs started. In fact i cant even remember the last time i saw these two teams play. A month is too long between the regular season and the BCS title game. 21-0 final. Roll Tide! Maybe the BCS will get a clue. Playoffs!!!

...the NFL Playoffs

Six months ago the NFL owners locked out all their players including, with all due respect Tim Tebow his lord and savior, in a dispute over how to fairly divide a $9 billion a year business and many wondered whether there would even be a football season. At that time we also wondered if Justin Bieber was a father, whether Bachmann, Perry, or Cain would win the GOP nomination and how long the Kardashian/Humphreys marriage would last. Of course six months is long enough to temper the spirits of political hopefuls, celebrity marriages, and teen heartthrob baby daddy rumors. Now that we're into week one of the NFL playoffs the cynicism and disillusionment we felt regarding the greed demonstrated by owners and players during the lockout has been replaced by spirited rivalries, athletic admiration, and an onslaught of beer ads and truck commercials. In the summer, the 99% of NFL fans was forced to occupy a position alongside billionaires or millionaires arguing over more money than even Exxon-Mobil possibly earns and absurd labor proposals such as being forced to work nearly eighteen weeks a year. Now millionaires mill around the field during extended TV timeouts while advertisers pay millions per minute to sell poor schleppers light beer, 4G phones, and 4x4s with the best towing capacity in their class. These same companies that hock us goods at halftime every Sunday pay billionaire NFL owners for the right to preside in luxury suites, preserve stadium naming rights for years, and receive free tickets to the Super Bowl, the biggest event of the year. This years game is being played in Indianapolis (Indianapolis in February anyone?) and tickets are said to have a face value comparable to the average Americans mortgage payment.The stories of the year in the NFL have been well chronicled. The failure of the Eagles dream team, the greatness of Aaron Rodgers during the first five months of the season then the greatness of Drew Brees during the last month, which team would truly suck for luck, and all the records broken during the year of the QB, with all due respect to Tim Tebow his lord and savior. Fantasy leagues are over and if fantasy owners were lucky they won their league because one of the elite quarterbacks, still playing well into January, threw for more yards this season alone than YA Tittle had in his entire forty seven year hall of fame career. in the reality that is the NFL, with all due respect to Tim Tebow his lord and savior it's an established fact that's it's a quarterback driven league. Several times this season both Aaron Rodgers and Drew Brees threw for hundreds of yards and multiple touchdowns while simultaneously walking on water, with all due respect to Tim Tebow his lord and savior. Whether Rodgers or Brees wins the regular season MVP is of little consequence after they meet in the inevitable NFC championship game at Lambeau Field, although after todays game the Giants bandwagon is quickly filling up...again. The winner of the Packers vs Saints will earn a trip to the Super Bowl in Indianapolis (again, Indianapolis in February anyone?) thus laying claim to being the best quarterback in the league not married to a supermodel. Indianapolis, the site of this years big game and the city with the most Arbys per capita in the U.S.A. is of course looking forward to picking first in the NFL draft after winning the suck for luck sweepstakes. The Colts will most certainly select the can't miss quarterback out of Stanford Andrew Luck and begin the nonstop scrutiny and gradual mummification of legendary Colts QB Peyton Manning. Analysts are already looking forward to the soap opera in Indy tentatively titled As the QB Turns, a spinoff of the Favre/Rodgers Green Bay Packers saga The QBs of Our Lives. It may be the most intriguing storyline to watch in the NFL for years to come, with all due respect to Tim Tebow his lord and savior. Now with week one of the NFL playoffs in the books it has confirmed that the elite quarterback is essential to compete for a championship. Rookie Andy Dalton and the upstart Bengals, Matt Ryan and the underacieving Falcons, and Matthew Stafford and the celebrated Lions were unable to advance this weekend. Week two games include four former Super Bowl winning elite QBs in action including Rodgers, Brees, Tom Brady, and Eli Manning. Some other notable QBs in action are former overall number one pick and comeback player of the year candidate Alex Smith of the 49ers, Houston Texans third string QB and star of the CBS cop drama TJ Yates Texas Ranger and with all due respect Tim Tebow his lord and savior.

...hot tub time machine

As as guy who grew up in the '80's and approaches his 40th birthday I can relate to all the characters in this crude, vulgar and terribly funny movie except maybe the fat black guy. Hot Tub Time Machine is much funnier than The Hangover which inexplicably made nearly twenty seven times more money at the box office. Even I missed Hot Tub Time Machine in the theaters but paid $10 for the Hangover not including $6 for stale popcorn and $4 for a diet coke with enough ice to pack a crate of fish. Each of the characters in this great movie are having their own kind of midlife crisis and it takes a suicide attempt by the hilarious Rob Cordry to bring them together for the first time in years. To help their troubled friend '80's star John Cusack and fat black guy Craig Robinson agree to take a trip to the ski lodge which was once the site of their former teenage glory. After a drunken mishap with a Russian energy drink and an old hot tub the old geezers wind up back in the '80s with all the mullets, high fades, and hormones they had as teenagers. Thanks to a cameo by '80's legend Chevy Chase they realize that the consequences of their actions could have repurcussions on the future but they also recognize that their adult lives haven't worked out quite as they had hoped. In the meantime as long as they're stuck in the '80's they may as well participate in all night drinking binges, consume enormous amounts of drugs and try to nail as many chicks as they did in 1986. I predict Hot Tub Time Machine will find a bigger audience through DVD sales and a long run on cable. The Hangover was a blockbuster and will have an inevitable and most likely several forgettable sequels but the great comedy Hot Tub Time Machine, just like the great decade it celebrates, will be considered a timeless classic for years to come.